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Tuesday, 22 July 2014

Lesson's Learned: Year one.

As many of you know, my hubby and I celebrated our first anniversary this month (cue applause). The first year was just as I expected and almost exactly like in the movies! Hah! Only kidding.

This first year was a lot of work. It was also a lot of fun, learning, laughing, crying, fighting, laundry, teamwork, compromise, and loving. I wouldn't change one single thing, but there are somethings I am going to do differently in year two.
Here are a few of the things I learned about myself, and marriage in general, in the last year.
1. I'm wildly impatient. Marriage requires patience. It also requires a lot of selflessness. I'm a work in progress...
2. Marriage is work. It's not seamless. It's not effortless. It takes two people giving 100 percent each and everyday.
3. It's ok to fight, functionally. I think this is one that's become common knowledge, but I'm saying it anyways. You don't need to fight about everything; some things are worth going to the wall on and some aren't. You'll learn which are and which aren't as you go. But sometimes you need to stand up for what you believe, and you should. Notice also that I said functionally. No fists need to be thrown, or daggers in the form of words.
4. You're still two people. I had the most difficult time when my husband and I first got married not feeling like I was trapped. For some reason I had worked up this idea in my mind that everything I would do from that moment on would have to involve my husband. This is untrue. While I value his opinion and talk to him before making most decisions I don't have to do everything with him, the same goes for him.
5. Love is best served biblically. Whether you have a relationship with Christ or not, I honestly believe that there is no better way to love than that which is depicted in 1 Corinthians 13:4-8; loving graciously, selflessly, patiently and truthfully.

"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails." 1 Corinthians 13:4-8

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